And How am I Supposed to Title THIS?!

Neither Calvin nor I  heard Caroline get up early, so we weren't aware of having an audience while we were canoodling in the hallway (What can I say? He's irresistible!) until we heard an irritated throat clearing, followed by, "EXCUSE me! When you two are finished with this embarrassing display of affection, maybe one of you could teach me to make scrambled eggs...?"